The Ned & Josh Podcast

Feet Pics an Economic Opportunity

Bike pegs go missing, and somehow that becomes a perfect metaphor for petty disputes. We also revisit the classic duo dilemma, including that awkward who do you like more survey energy, then step into the cursed arena of feet ratings and paid requests.
From there, it is pandas being used as diplomatic leverage, a breakup streaming timeline, and a Carhartt overall fantasy that gets shut down with the tenderness of a slammed door.
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Blokes Chatting Nude

We start with the very serious subject of Ikea’s half metre hot dog and the lingering meatball lore, plus a quick Costco menu appreciation moment. From there, Ned pulls out an “ends or tails” brain glitch and tries to get meaningful about loss, music, and that feeling of suddenly not being alone because a song nailed it first.
Also featured: conjunctivitis tears, “clothes casket” as a concept, swimming for cardio and immediately regretting the change room culture, and a French hospital evacuation that could have been avoided by literally not doing that.
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100k Condoms at the Winter Olympics

A single AirPod gets destroyed. A hundred thousand condoms disappear in three days. Parliament House refuses to modernise its blinds. That’s the energy this week. We explore Olympic Village myths, leadership instability in Australian politics, and the absurdity of calling 11,000 “hits” a digital explosion.
Plus: graphic novels as chew toys, why $87 suddenly feels like $100, the nostalgia of MySpace blog culture, and the ongoing transformation from sending cute capybara videos to forwarding dangerous memes. It’s friendship evolution, economic confusion, and global sporting chaos — all evenly weighted.
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Tokyo Drift Is the Best

Josh accidentally time travelled to 2016 on mic and it sparked a level of outrage usually reserved for parking fines and cancelled gigs. Then we tumble into the surprisingly spiritual truth behind My Life Be Like. Also yes, Tokyo Drift gets its flowers. Somehow that leads to a pub sociology study about seventy plus blokes acting invincible, a proposal involving highly capable fifty five year olds and the weird tension of walking past a Department of Defence conference like you have personally launched the doomsday clock. Secretary versus secretary, and a genuinely grim hallway of dog hair that looks like it has been ploughed.Find us on Instagram @nedandjosh

Olympic Crotch Inflation Scandal

Ned and Josh are back with a 60-degree temperature swing, a controversial Winter Olympics penis scandal and the return of Minecraft as a mental health barometer. They unpack how dog babysitting turned into fart management, how musical theatre failed to inspire Lenny,and how Josh nearly became the Grim Reaper over a casual birthday comment. There’s also a terrifying deep dive into ski jumping, a weirdly sincere breakdown of road rage in the TikTok era and some uncomfortable millennial introspection. Find us on Instagram @nedandjosh

Airport Security Thought I Was Hiding a Bomb

It's Superbowl Monday and what starts as a welcome back quickly turns into an argument with airport security, society, and phone notifications. Ned and Josh cover cruises, holidays, government Instagram appearances, and why watching The Sopranos too much can alter your personality. There’s also a surprisingly heated discussion about baby skulls and whether humans would have evolved past that by now. Add in an uncomfortable stock photography revelation, a song that refuses to leave one brain alone, and a major podcast announcement that the Pod Pals may not love and you've got the first episode for 2026. Find us on Instagram @nedandjosh

A Guest in My Own House

Food wars erupt as Josh trashes the sacred roast and sides with prawns and Thousand Island dressing. Ned relives a moment where carbonara nearly took him out for the day. There's also a dramatic phone call simulation, accidental ASMR and a brutally honest take on how bad modern sayings have become. With gift rejections, sock-based betrayal and shoutouts that somehow include Michael J. Fox and Instagram Reels it's the final episode for 2025. For more, go to @nedandjosh on Instagram. See you in 2026!

Santa Doesn’t Pay Taxes

It’s the second last episode of the year and we’re spiralling: Ned wants gifts, Josh wants quiet and Christmas apparently has no aura. We discuss mysterious men, swimming rage, bar job negotiations and Josh’s deep-seated issues with Hamish & Andy’s wealth.
Instagram? That’s @nedandjosh.

Christmas Gift Gamble

It’s our final Tuesday of 2025 and Josh’s mum is FaceTiming mid-show, which somehow spirals into a full-blown debate about whether “no presents this year” ever really means no presents. Then we jump into In-N-Out banning “Order 67”, how memes ruin perfectly good numbers, and the science (or nonsense) behind cats supposedly thinking we’re their giant kittens. All before a real-life Mrs Claus refuses a zoo licence for her ten reindeer. Find us on Instagram @nedandjosh.

ACT Speed Cameras Feel Like The Hunger Games

A barista in a holster walks into a wedding... and that’s not even the weirdest part. Also: GPS-based police paranoia, unplanned pub trips, why worming yourself might be self-care, and how flannel shirts could save your dignity.

Mum’s Christmas Payback

Buckle up for a podcast that covers everything from wax effigies to economic chaos. We’re talking wax museums (legit ones and knock-offs), why punching Trump’s wax figure feels oddly satisfying to strangers, and Josh’s Flight Simulator obsession that’s gone full Top Gun. There’s a hostile takeover in the media world and an even more hostile takeover of Christmas by Josh’s mum.

Lenny Knows Jesus

A shoelace disaster leads to an accidental headbutt in a lift, trivia night power goes to someone’s head and Lenny the dog continues to believe every knock at the door could be Bluey, Jesus or both. There’s authority confusion, cheek-to-cheek contact with a stranger and a very serious debate about whether ordering food via app to your own table has gone too far. Also: spelling “platinum,” glitter borders in school projects and why QR code menus are creating a divide.

Organisationally Unattractive Man

Could you justify spending $3 million on a Batmobile? We try. There’s also Netflix-and-chill movie trauma, dangerous levels of nostalgia for potato cakes and a philosophical debate about complimenting a stranger's gift in a shopping centre. Plus: Batman, but he’s broke and has to go get all his batarangs back.

The Pope and a Hot Dog

What do spider hydraulics, the Pope eating hot dogs and an insult to Dunedin all have in common? This episode, apparently. Ned & Josh dive into drive-by bird flipping, Spider-Man’s anatomy, Michael Bublé’s song ownership issues and Google’s unhinged autocomplete results. Plus a moment for cruise-based identity theft, bingo plans and Rockin’ Robyn’s broken ankle.

Hot Regulator Department

Can you get fired for being too ugly in a staff photo? Ned’s testing it. Josh is dreaming of a bike and midlife freedom. There’s snail theft in France, childhood caroling ambitions that come 20 years too late, and one hell of a rant about the Word of the Year. Plus, Summernats incoming and a philosophical take on cow destinies.

They Froze Pavarotti’s Legs Off

Cheeseburgers, Big Brother and Bronze Pavarotti bellies, this one's got it all. Ned and Josh dissect the return (and rapid exit) of Big Brother, the ethics of Funko Pop Kurt Cobain, why John Candy wouldn’t want a documentary and how a statue became an ice-skating rink mascot. Plus: dodgy early-2000s fashion choices, baby magpies that look like pensioners and the underrated beauty of the McSmart meal. Oh, and Josh confesses he might be skipping cardio because of swooping season.

Bonjour Barbie, Let’s Go Party

From ringtones and Zoo magazines to butterfly kisses and crowd-funded musical tickets, this episode is a nostalgic rollercoaster. We debate Dance Dance Revolution’s place in actual dance, the future of dogs post-humanity and whether Siri’s just gaslighting us now. Plus: a game of “He Said, Who Said?”, a lawn care confession and the longest fart in human history (allegedly).

The Prime Minister's Bucks Night

A Prime Minister’s surprise wedding, a cursed toilet cubicle, and the world’s loneliest schoolies run club. There’s TikTok renaming venues, AI guessing ages and a full-blown identity crisis involving Abel Tasman.

Crocs in the Office, Koalas in the Trees

You never forget your first food poisoning, especially when it’s your fault. Ned learns that the chicken you’re suspicious of is usually suspicious for a reason, while Josh mourns not being allowed to keep a koala. There’s Monster Energy judgement, dress code dilemmas and a heartfelt moment of driving validation from a Pod Pal.

The Better Doodle

Robert Irwin’s Dancing With the Stars win has us feeling national pride, avoided rage at America and confused about his rib injury. Ned meets someone who held his actual childhood dream job and ropes his mum into confirming it. A rear-ending incident leads to an existential crisis, Josh and his dad battle it out with voicemails and Michael touches Halloween decorations that weren’t his. Plus: mango Monster gets reviewed, The Nice Guys still deserves a sequel and Kangaroo Jack somehow gets dragged into international relations.

An Hour in Eagle Talons

An eagle steals a cat, Ned gets told off for too many toys at work and a Monster can scores big in Sermonstier. Josh shares a humiliating run-in with a driving instructor while turning right and Ned reveals his old list of rejected vaccine jokes from 2021. Also, a deep dive into Hugh Grant’s full name and why it might secretly be the best joke no one’s talking about.

The Sexy Playlist That Wasn't

Coughing for privacy, clicking fake links, and critiquing can design... all in a day’s work. The boys kick off the Monster Energy review series, unpack the politics of seductive playlists, and celebrate a rare win for Ned's dumbest movie theory. Plus, why workplace seminars feel like punishment.

Scaring Kids to Help Mums

Josh and Ned debate podcasting guilt while a nine-year-old flexes power over a desperate mum. At a school concert, Josh triggers chaos with the “six-seven” reflex and is now plotting a Christmas prank. The boys workshop “SommeMonster” and commit to an energy drink taste test. Meanwhile, mangoes divide the household and Michael joins the mic to fight for bench space and recycling justice.

The Hottest Guy in Canberra

Between Nan’s broken ankle and Josh’s encounter with a human Greek god, this episode is packed with chaos. Ned sets off every motion-activated fart toy in Big W while looking for a Dragon Ball Z figurine, then gets publicly blamed for it. Josh questions whether being hot would be a nightmare, and Ned brainstorms a single Roomba-powered Christmas tree to replace hundreds. Things wrap up with a debate on screaming at Alexa and whether Siri is still safe to bully.

Great Baldness Breakthrough

Josh’s cul-de-sac neighbour waves with the enthusiasm of a hostage, a car screams bloody murder over low wiper fluid and Ned debates whether psychopathy is a real word. There’s general business sabotage, new job nerves and a family FaceTime that turns into a roast session. Also, is hair regrowth finally real? Plus Michael returns just in time to be blamed for everything.

Tattoo Vouchers for Nan

Josh forgets his wallet is missing for a week, Ned shops for Rockin’ Robin’s 90th (and considers a Shania Twain box set) and flags start disappearing from embassy cars when it rains. They rage at Coca-Cola’s AI laziness while fully embracing the power of AI to turn a dog into a gypsy mystic. Ned tries to outgrow his late-guy label as he preps for a confusing town launch and embraces his new job. Then they invent Insompatico Amigos, a game where the only consistent rule is that the boys are never on the same wavelength.

Busloads of Queenslanders

Josh flexes his new role as a TV review influencer, while Ned deals with the fallout of a rogue dog tooth to the forehead. There’s a deep dive into how long you can be concussed without knowing and a plan to force Instagram followers into engagement, or exile. Also featuring: cult mechanics, radioactive dog misidentifications and the ultimate teacher nightmare... being stuck on a bus with 50 Year 9s.

You Can't Clone Vibes

From artificially cleaning a filthy deck for Instagram to calling out Michael’s ungrateful gaming attitude, this one’s a mess. The boys do a deep, too deep, dive into Baldur’s Gate, accidentally name their fans something algorithmically unwise and test out a chaotic new game called Poker Mouth, complete with screaming headphones and nightclub-level confusion. There's Amazon's tastemaker invites, cloning dogs and why Woody Harrelson might kill Ned. Give it a go.

thnks fr nthng

Josh was convinced Ned secretly went into the Big Brother house. The timelines line up and the paranoia spirals. Meanwhile, Ricky Martin hits Canberra and triggers a full-blown debate: guilty pleasures vs. Britpop snobbery and why Josh would pick Livin’ La Vida Loca over Wonderwall any day. We revisit banned childhood TV shows, dream jobs and the crushing reality of not being spotted on Spotify. Somehow, it all makes sense.

Katy Perry’s Shoulder Parrot

Justin Trudeau and Katy Perry are reportedly dating and somehow, it kind of makes sense? The boys draft their dream celebrity-politician couples, try to decode California’s dog-faced butterfly and talk about losing money on wildly ambitious sports bets. There’s also a wild tangent about Fear Factor, Stranger Things and sending texts without looking.

Why Grown Men Should Be Allowed to Sparkle

We want adult-sized light-up shoes, Josh is obsessed with his new cordless mower and Michael accuses Ned of a chocolate cover-up. Plus, a bear breaks into a zoo and the boys lose their minds over bad movie sequel naming. From “Now You See Me” to “Bear Shawshank,” it’s nonsense.

The Rin Tin Tin Cinematic Universe

From elevator improv identities to a nostalgic dream house in Tasmania, the boys unpack the strange sadness of modern life and why we desperately need a new dog movie star. Plus: a masterclass in pissing off trivia hosts.

Let the Kids Win, You Maniac

A pronunciation fight over Sade spirals into full-blown chaos, Michael destroys Josh’s stepsons in Crash Team Racing and a drive-thru rant becomes a bold pitch for fast food reform. Plus, the boys react to podcasts being eligible for a Golden Globe and wonder… do kids even care about treehouses anymore?

When’s It Okay to Yell at Other Adults?

Halloween drama, adult yelling etiquette and Josh’s full-blown nose-pick caught on camera. Also featuring stealthy voice note sabotage, the Dodgers win again and Canberra proves it's too scenic for private moments.

Big Spooky Ned's Big Spooky Show

It’s costumes on, judgement high and the return of a fan-favourite game maybe coming soon. Ned’s dressed like a walking skeleton, Josh is a discount Batman and the boys are dragging Michael into Halloween whether he likes it or not. Clowns, Stephen King and a real fear of whales? Happy Halloween.

The Art of Financial Self-Sabotage

It's the pod before Halloween and Ned’s ready to TP houses while Josh just wants to supervise like a responsible stepdad. There’s costume confusion, accent-offending small talk and a deep dive into whether $7 parking is worth a $140 fine. A festive mess.

Soap and a Senior Government Official

A gala night goes off the rails when Josh accidentally declares his hygiene routine in front of the wrong crowd. Meanwhile, Ned gets philosophical about owning a bowling ball. Plus, roasted at the supermarket and getting philosophical about broken down tow-trucks.

A Friendship on the Edge

Ever avoided plans with your mates by blaming your bank account? Ned did and then all hell broke loose. There’s passive-aggression, PlayStation purchases and a full-blown Frankenstein feud. An episode fuelled by honesty, rage and light-up gaming accessories.

Border Security Made My Dad Cry

It’s spooky week, but the scariest thing here is Josh’s Uber Eats history. The boys unpack the new Harry Potter TV show casting, Australianisms that feel fake and the eternal quest for a comfy car seat. There’s merch news, bread roll confessions and tales of misfired travel advice.

And With That, We’re Bloody Done

End-of-year slideshow fatigue, KFC name drama and major Ned & Josh living arrangement news. Discover why the return of wired headphones is driving Josh mad and hear the slow descent into chaos as things officially get different.

Perfumador vs Tapeworm

A new health obsession, a poop-tracking app and a surprise cologne phase. Josh gets obsessed with wearable tech, and Ned reveals his WWE-level dog wrestling tactics. There's open-home story involving cereal and 20 strangers. It’s a ride through personal reinvention, property madness and canine grappling.

You Can See Both Your Nipples

An 11-year friendship tested by memory failure and gift-giving etiquette. A heated battle over whether air conditioning or beds are humanity’s greatest achievement. Plus, unsolicited Wicked trivia, squeaky shoes on trial and a moustache that should’ve stayed dead.

The True Crime Podcast Epidemic

Ned and Josh dive into Halloween madness, debate the invention of ice and take a few shots at Adelaide while hyping up Perth. There’s dad energy, pokie machine confusion, true crime podcast fatigue and Josh nearly gets fooled into mourning Dick Van Dyke.

Why Was Hamish There?

We return from a well-timed break (yes, Josh is alive) and dive headfirst into everything from racehorse ownership and algorithm manipulation to unexpected bees and grandparent nicknames. Ned pitches Josh a bold new Soprano related fashion era and we unravel the great mystery of why Hamish Blake was at the Murrumbateman Field Days. There’s talk of family chaos, minor gambling problems and the exact protocol if Josh suddenly dies. It’s good to be back.

The Garage of Doom

Ned adopts a goldfish with a wild survival story, Josh gets caught in a workplace phishing scam and the guys uncover the oddly satisfying world of a German reality show where contestants cut things perfectly in half. There’s movie trivia, four-day weekend debates and the official launch of the rank of “General Business.”

Simpsons 2: Just End It Already

A very mean squirrel and a long-overdue Simpsons funeral. There’s spooky season excitement, existential timekeeping and a surprising amount of duck chat. Plus, Wiki Who makes a comeback... thanks a lot, Carolyn.

One More Dollop and I'm Leaving

Hijacking the pod for a very important listener, plus a debate about dog anatomy that spirals into existential territory. There’s sticker-based reputational damage, a moment of partner betrayal involving tomato sauce and the musical habit that nearly ended a marriage. Also, mystery CD tracks, wizard game hypocrisy and the lingering pain of feeling clever but sounding dumb.

Snoop, the MCG and Camping

Slam Pro Wrestling chaos, banking rage and a cobra-fuelled night terror all feature in this Monday edition. Recounts of being put through a table, nearly missing out on McDonald's thanks to late-night maintenance,= and screaming like a chicken. Plus the Australia Zoo zookeeper theory, Snoop Dogg’s “motorhome scandal” and a possible Hawk Tuah airport sighting.

Booed by Association

A villain in the ring, a dad in the carpool lane and a fire marshal on the mic... Josh is wearing a lot of hats this week. Plus dog name rankings, Ned’s questionable impressions get dissected and a deep dive into forgotten podcast games including Confession Sandwich and Inventor or Invented.
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Wrong Limousine Company

A mystery glass in a pub trough sparks a hospitality horror story you’ll never unhear. We unpack baby shower games, nose ring ambition and Emma Watson’s distaste for press tours. There’s vintage footy merch, limos you’re apparently using wrong and a WrestleMania tantrum that still stings.
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Brought to You by Corporate Synergy

A fake name for Harry Styles, a $30 wind-up toy and the eternal fight for who gets to wear black. There’s roadwork chaos, Pedro Pascal gets rebranded and a hot take on age guesses that’s either flattering or offensive. Plus: DiDi vs Uber, Michael skips the gym for an airport run and the clean-shaven return of pre-COVID Ned.
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Sandwiches for Sinatra

Josh grapples with iPhone envy, Ned questions his negotiating skills over a $40 ET figurine and together they deep dive into the wild world of celebrity backstage riders—featuring Frank Sinatra’s soup obsession. Plus, an unexpected obsession with Rumun, the AFL’s Tasmanian devil mascot, gets unpacked and Ned questions the wisdom of putting him in charge of training new staff. There’s an a surprising amount of soup chat in this mess of an episode of The Ned & Josh Podcast.
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Midnight Backyard Break-In

Locked out, hungover and still hitting record. We recount a chaotic midnight return home featuring lost keys, barking golden retrievers and a very creative wake-up call. Ned and Josh go head-to-head in a new round of Lyrical Battleships, featuring confusion over Kelly Clarkson and a valiant but failed attempt to guess. Plus Ned defends wearing a softball jersey with his own name on it and the boys weigh in on a man tanning himself with Louis Vuitton logos.
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A Weasel Broke the Universe

What do a rogue weasel, mid-air gnocchi and the Hadron Collider have in common? Apparently, the end of the world as we knew it. We dive into the chaos of 2016, question whether we’re living in a broken timeline and unpack the most unhinged plane passenger behaviour yet. Josh ditches Snapchat, Ned unveils a wildly specific iMessage background, a cave experiment rewires human sleep and Mr Beast cops a punch (kind of). Oh, and there’s growing tension over whether Josh should be invited to Ned’s work movie nights.
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The Toss Master

Does a trip to Downton Abbey make Josh the youngest person in the cinema, a World Rock Skimming Championship is rocked by scandal and we uncover the true limits of borrowing between mates. Plus: Ned kicks his car, a human washing machine leaves us with hygiene questions and Cosmo is traumatised after being accidentally insulted.
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iOS 26 and the CIA Conspiracy

A bear eats himself into a honey ice cream coma, Josh uncovers a wild iOS 26 conspiracy involving the CIA and Ned considers a 100-year time capsule film that requires full frontal nudity. There's alien talk (E.T., Signs, Marvin the Martian), Friends trivia fails (Shandler? Dross?) and the great LaBuBu vs LaFuFu toy scandal. Plus: Reese’s Pieces nostalgia, Charlie the Unicorn brainrot and the moment Ned officially becomes unc.
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The Pickle Game

Demands for a specific KitKat at a servo, Ned reflects on being bitten on the sack by a dog and Ned accidentally invents The Pickle Game. There’s a full breakdown of dad-ified band names, a passionate defence of Samwise Gamgee and a heated debate about whether wizards should walk. Josh finally admits that his fashion North Star turns out to be Andy Lee. Plus: scary movie dilemmas, middle-of-the-day cinema bliss and the big question... what word have you said the most in your life?
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Christmas in September

A guy racks up $16K in cruise debt and jumps overboard and Ned reckons the fake name he used sounds suspiciously like one Josh would make up. Christmas trees are already up in stores. There’s also Hard Rated Solo, the return of Red Bears, Labubu hitting Canberra and Josh "rawdonging" spring without allergy meds. Plus, Ned’s sister plays in a grand final, construction starts too bloody early and we realise we only care about sport when someone we know is playing.
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Snakes, Clowns and Emotional Growth

Which dogs survived the Titanic? Why did Josh's BBQ cause hunger after the meal? And what sound do you make when you hear the word "Stegosaurus"? It's all nonsense, but it's all here.
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Every Batman Is a Good Batman

A snail named Ned who can’t find love, a burger bun mystery that didn’t need solving and a shoulder bump from a Bunnings grandpa. There’s casual dudes in formal settings, travel vlog obsessions and a full Batman ranking nobody asked for.
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